TODAY IS

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Exactly 7 months away from Christmas Day. Now who's silly for leaving the lights up? But, yeah, probably should take the tree down.

Ellen's former, Anne Heche, turns 47. Her career has slowed down a bit. Apparently, she's between celebrities. For a while, she was Ellen's sig other, but then she married Coleman Laffoon (2001-09) and became mom. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

Mike Myers turns 53 today. Has he got another Austin Powers in him? Maybe for... one million dollars! (insert fanfare here) He sure has been quiet lately. Actually, he and Austin Powers must be working under cover.

Connie Sellecca turns 61 today and will have to endure another 20-minute, new age rendition of "Happy Birthday to you" by her husband, John Tesh.

Actress Karen Valentine turns 69 today. She's still in Room 222, but instead of being at a school, it's now in a 55 and older condo.


Puppeteer and director Frank Oz turns 72 today. He's not only the voice of Yoda, but also Miss Piggy. Huge identify crisis has he. Becoming a geezer, he is. For all those who say, "Men are such pigs!" Frank really is one.

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