WEIRD NEWS

How South Koreans Deal With Bullies

Kim Jon Un has been mouthing off quite a bit lately and it appears that South Korea has finally had enough. So they've taken the unusual step of publicly speaking about their plans to assassinate the North Korean dictator and other North Korean leaders in the event of conflict using something called the "decapitation squad." After North Korea's latest nuclear test, South Korean Defense Minister Song Young Moo told lawmakers that he was speeding up the creation of a "decapitation unit" capable of crossing the border for nighttime missions against North Korean facilities and its "wartime command." Officials say the special forces unit, which will apparently be comprised of members of the "Spartan 3000" unit, will be capable of striking anywhere in the Korean Peninsula within 24 hours. Song has said he wants to have the unit ready by the end of the year. The creation of the unit is part of South Korea's "Massive Punishment and Retaliation" plan for possible war with the North. Analysts say that by disclosing facts about the "decapitation unit," Seoul appears to want to make Pyongyang nervous enough to think twice about its nuclear program and return to the negotiating table. Retired Gen. Shin Won Sik, formerly the South Korean military's chief strategist, said, "The best deterrence we can have, next to having our own nukes, is to make Kim Jong Un fear for his life." (New York Times)

"Slaves 4 Sale" in Missouri

In Liberty, Missouri, the neighbors of Richard Geisenheyner were not too happy about him flying a Confederate battle flag in front of his home and let him know it. Mr. Geisenheyner responded by placing a sign above his Confederate flag - a sign that read: "Slaves 4 Sale." He says, "If people actually believe that a Confederate flag stands for slavery, well, I might as well be just as stupid as they are." Geisenheyner, who has mixed-race grandchildren, said he flies the Confederate battle flag to make a political statement noting, "It is for people that are tired of the government telling them what to do and what to think. That is what a Southern rebel is." Obviously the public outcry over the sign was fierce and Geisenheyner took it down the next day because he believes his point has been made. Neighbors speaking to reporters said they hope that in the future Giesenhyner might choose a different way to vent his frustrations. Meanwhile he's not expected to get many trick-or-treaters this year. (FOX 4KC)

When Grandpa Reaches His Limit

In La Puente, California, some nut job was jumping from rooftop to rooftop of the single-story homes on Beckner Street for hours, refusing commands from deputies and crisis negotiators to stop and come down. But after being up on the roof of 83-year-old Wilford Burgess' house for about an hour, Burgess got fed up. So he borrowed a neighbor's ladder, climbed up on his roof and pushed the suspect off into the waiting arms of police. Granddaughter, Ashley Wrenn, recorded the whole thing on video and said she was thankful her grandfather was protecting his family. After the big push, the suspect was taken into custody and was admitted to a hospital for a mental evaluation. As for Mr. Burgess, he said staying in shape is important to him in his 80s. He added, "I tell everybody, 'Just because you're old, that don't mean you got to sit down. As long as you're able to move, move.'" (ABC 7)

No Cash for Pot in Hawaii!

So Hawaii legalized medical marijuana and found they suddenly had a new problem on their hands - robberies and other crimes targeting pot dispensaries. So now the Aloha state wants to be the first to have marijuana sales handled sans cash! All of Hawaii's eight licensed dispensaries have agreed to go cashless by Oct. 1 and patients will have to use a debit payment app. The app is already an option for marijuana transactions in six states, including California and Colorado. Many marijuana businesses use cash because banks fear pot money could expose them to legal trouble from the US government, which regulates banking and still bans marijuana. Hawaii is also still working on allowing prepaid, stored-value cards to be used an alternative for people who don't have checking accounts. (Newser)

Pizza Hut PR Nightmare

According to one tweet: "Pizza Hut is willing to kill people FOR PIZZA!!!!!" That was just one response over an alleged in-store memo made the social media rounds. Consumerist reports that, ahead of Hurricane Irma barreling down on Florida, the memo was distributed to employees at one of the chain's Jacksonville locations. And while the rest of the Sunshine State made plans to shore up their homes, seek out nearby shelters, or evacuate, these Pizza Hut employees were told: "Our No. 1 priority is the safety and security of our team. But we also have a responsibility and commitment to our community to be there when they need us." The letter then goes on to list some of the "guidelines" employees needed to heed before, during, and after the storm. Those included noting the store wouldn't close until six to 12 hours before the storm's expected arrival; workers would have a 24-hour "grace period" in terms of work scheduling ("You cannot evacuate Friday for a Tuesday storm event!"), a time frame the Washington Post deems "risky"; and all employees "MUST return within 72 hours" of an evacuation. Anyone not showing up for work would be a "no call/no show," no matter the reason, and "documentation will be issued." Fortune notes because Florida is an "at-will" employment state, such a policy would fall in a "legal gray area" Pizza Hut issued a statement: "We absolutely do not have a policy that dictates when team members can leave or return from a disaster, and the manager who posted this letter did not follow company guidelines." (Newser)

Country Singers Ain't What They Used to Be

Katie Quackenbush is a 26-year-old aspiring country singer from Texas, but she doesn't seem to have too many of the values we typically associate with the genre. She's been charged with the attempted murder of a homeless Nashville man who asked her to move her Porsche. Police say Quackenbush shot 54-year-old Gerald Melton after he complained about loud music and exhaust fumes from the Porsche SUV where she was sitting with a friend while he was trying to sleep on a sidewalk near Nashville's Music Row around 3am on Aug. 26. Police say that after a loud argument, Quackenbush got out of her vehicle with a gun and shot Melton twice in the abdomen before leaving the scene without calling authorities. Melton is still in a Nashville hospital with critical injuries. Quackenbush's father, an attorney in Amarillo, gives a different account claiming after Melton screamed threats in the vehicle's window and walked away, his daughter grabbed her gun to escort her friend back to her vehicle. He says when Melton walked toward her again, she closed her eyes and fired two "warning shots" before leaving, unaware she had injured the man. However, Quackenbush, who was released on $25,000 bond after being charged Monday night, was arrested for assault in Texas in 2013 and again in December last year. (Tennessean)

The Blob Lives!

British engineers say they've launched a "sewer war" against a giant blob clogging London's sewer system. Thames Water officials said it will likely take three weeks to dissolve what they're calling a giant "fatberg" - measuring 275 yards long and weighs about 143 tons! The so-called fatberg is made up of congealed wet wipes, diapers, fat, and oil, and is rock hard. Officials said the task is "basically like trying to break up concrete." Eight workers are using high-powered jet hoses to break up the blob before sucking it out into tankers for disposal at a recycling site. (BBC)

What the What?

Here's a pro-tip: Proposing over water may not be your best option. Seth Dixon planned to propose to the love of his life, Ruth Salas, on a wooden footbridge over a pond with friends watching on. In a video of the romantic encounter, Dixon gets down on one knee and takes out a small box. Then: disaster. Dixon opens the box and a $3,000 diamond ring - on which the Uber driver is still making payments - falls out and slips through a crack in the bridge. Salas said, "You could hear a little plop." Salas, Dixon and others all got into the water but there was so much mud and nasty algae they never found it. A second search with a metal detector the following morning also proved no use. So, the couple, who are getting married in October, set up a GoFundMe page to buy a replacement ring but for some reason shut it down after raising just $261. (Kansas City Star)

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