ON THIS DAY
In 1809, the U.S. Supreme Court ruled that the power of the Federal government is greater than that of any individual state. Looks like we'll be giving that one a workout.
On this date in 1839, Congress prohibited dueling in the District of Columbia. Can you believe that? They passed actual legislation about guns? Back then, people settled arguments with pistols at 10 paces. Today, we have Judge Judy.
In 1872, the Metropolitan Museum of Art officially opened in New York City. Oh, Metropolitan... I thought it was Neopolitan. I wondered, "Why would they make an entire museum dedicated to ice cream?"
On this date in 1945, the minimum wage for textile workers was raised to 55 cents an hour. Money was important to them. After all, textile workers are so material. Or is it sew material?
In 1962, U.S. astronaut John Glenn becomes the first person to orbit the Earth in the Friendship 7 space capsule. He had to orbit several times, as he had trouble finding a place to park.
Rihanna hits the big 3-0 today. Under her umbrella... .brella... brella... .
Actress and model Cindy Crawford turns 52 today. The phrase "Doesn't matter" comes to mind. Still a model, just a little less super.
French Stewart of "Third Rock" and "Mom" fame, turns 54 today. His name always sounded like kissing a mouse to me.
Charles Barkley turns 55 today. Several of his more in-shape friends are going to celebrate by running a lap around him.
- That would be years old, not inches around.
- To say he's outspoken is like saying the ocean is wet.
- The former NBA star is so big, when he wants to date, he places an ad in the multiple listings.
- He's so huge, over the past several months he's developed three moons.
- Some thought he might someday become our 51st state.
Newspaper heiress Patty Hearst-Shaw turns 64 today. She was kidnapped by a group of radicals back in the 70s and that inspired the joke, "Want a Hearst burger? A Hearst burger? What's a Hearst burger? Oh, it's just like a regular hamburger, except no patty.
Ivana Trump, the President's Ex... well, one of them... turns 69 today.
Singer Nancy Wilson turns 81 today. Her most famous line is, "No! I'm not with Heart! That's the other Nancy Wilson!"
Former Indy race car driver Bobby Unser turns 84 today. Needless to say, he's been around the track.