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Friday, October 19, 2018

The NRA Great American Outdoor Show Returns Feb. 2-10, 2019!

SIGNS YOU'RE WASTING YOUR TIME

(Men's Health)
  • Any weather small talk that lasts longer than 4 seconds (unless it involves a car floating away). If you have nothing to talk about other than the weather, face it, you have noting to talk about.
  • Two years. No raise.
  • The person running the meeting asks, "Could someone get the lights?"
  • You hit triple digits on the cable box, decide to cycle through once more and realize that "What Women Want" is still the best option.
  • You spend more than an hour and a half a day in the gym. What's the point of building all those muscles if you don't get out once in a while and use them?
  • You've been introduced to someone three times, and he still doesn't remember your name.
  • She says it's enough to have seen the Eiffel Tower in Vegas.
  • You watch any movie featuring a mischievous kid who advises adults.
  • You look at your watch during any activity. Either find something you really want to do or stop wearing a watch.
  • You give your honest feedback to someone who says, "I want your honest feedback."
  • You read any e-mail with the subject line "This is not a hoax."

DON'T CALL ME SHIRLEY

If you want to win her favors, guys, don't call her "babe." Or baby. Or muffin. Or sexy pants. That's the word from the British company Siteopia.com, which surveyed 2000 Brits recently to find out the pet names they hate the most and the ones they actually like to be called. Of all the pet names women deplore, "babe" got the most votes, while "gorgeous" was the number one preferred endearment.
The top 20 pet names women hate the most:
  1. Babe
  2. Sweet cheeks
  3. Snookums
  4. Baby doll
  5. Baby girl
  6. Muffin
  7. Ducky
  8. Baby cakes
  9. Sexy pants
  10. Pudding
  11. Muffin
  12. Angel pie
  13. Pumpkin
  14. Puppy
  15. Sugar lips
  16. Treacle
  17. Baby
  18. Pickle
  19. Honeybun
  20. Sugar pie

The top 20 pet names women find acceptable:
  1. Gorgeous
  2. Beautiful
  3. Lovely
  4. Love
  5. Darling
  6. Honey
  7. Sexy
  8. Angel
  9. Dearest
  10. Precious
  11. Treasure
  12. Snowflake
  13. Blossom
  14. Sweetie pie
  15. Sexy legs
  16. Lover
  17. Buttercup
  18. Flower
  19. Princess
  20. Sweetness

FINEST WORDS FOR DRINKING

From "jingled" to "crapulous," we have some real doozies that describe drinking alcohol and the effects thereof -- all thanks to the editors at Merriam-Webster. And these are just a handful. There are hundreds of such words in the English language! From "merry widow" to "pretties," find out the top 10 weirdest words or underwear.

1. Jingled
Definition: mildly drunk

2. Pot-valiant
Definition: bold or courageous under the influence of alcoholic drink

3. Half-seas over
Definition: drunk; originates from an 1869 English ditty titled "Half-Seas Over," which extols the benefits of getting a little soused before attempting to romance a woman.

4. Crapulous
Definition: 1.) marked by intemperance especially in eating or drinking. 2.) to be sick from excessive indulgence in liquor

5. O-be-joyful
Definition: intoxicating drink

6. Katzenjammer
Definition: the nausea, headache and debility that often follow dissipation or drunkenness

7. Vandyke
Definition: to stagger, weave or wander in the zigzag course of one drunken or irresolute

8. Bug juice
Definition: inferior whiskey or other strong liquor

9. Glorious
Definition: hilariously drunk

10: Angel's share
Definition: an amount of an alcoholic drink (such as cognac, brandy or whiskey) that is lost to evaporation when the liquid is being aged in porous oak barrels

GROSS THINGS COUPLES DO TOGETHER

Beginning with this list of disgusting things that most couples eventually do in a relationship. Please feel free to ad to the list.

Sharing toothbrush
Looking up the other person's nose
Chatting while one person is on the toilet

SIGNS YOUR PET NEEDS THERAPY

(Health) Know when barking, scratching, or other bad behavior is a problem and when to get help. Just like humans pets act out every now and then. But when is it time for an intervention? Any behavior that's atypical or presents in unusual contexts is worthy of veterinary attention, says Stephanie Borns-Weil, DVM, head of the Tufts Animal Behavior Clinic. Here's, how to tell if it's time to send a furry friend to behavioral therapy:

She chews everything in sight
Shoes, books, pillows. Ideally, your pooch shouldn't be ruining stuff past puppyhood. According to Borns-Weil, ongoing excessive chewing can result from fear, insufficient mental stimulation, or too little exercise. Try placing your pup in doggy day care to help banish boredom-induced gnawing, and puppy-proof your pad to avoid property damage. If neither do-it-yourself option helps, you'll want to consult a behaviorist for further assistance.

He has severe separation anxiety
Keeping your pup in a crate can make this problem even worse. "Most dogs find it upsetting to be confined when they're stressed," says Carlo Siracusa, DVM, of the University of Pennsylvania School of Veterinary Medicine. "If they try to escape, they can cause serious injuries to themselves." Instead, leave him in a room with a gated doorway, with treats and toys. Use a camera to monitor him via an app during the day: "If his anxiety isn't improving, talk to your vet," says Siracusa.

She's overly aggressive
Animal aggression can manifest in many ways, from biting and yowling to hissing and scratching. "the majority of bites tend to happen with people whom dogs know and from dogs that have no previous history of biting. Siracusa explains, "If your dog is growling and barking at you or a family member, take her to a behaviorist immediately because these behaviors can turn into biting." Cats typically aren't as social as dogs, so a less friendly attitude isn't usually cause for concern.

WEIRD NEWS

Humanity at Its Best

And our hero of the week award goes to Jake Tobin, a cross country runner and a sophomore at New York's Cazenovia High School. Tobin was in the lead in the final stretch of Saturday's boy's junior varsity race in Auburn when Fairport High School's Luke Fortner came into view. Fortner, who is legally blind and runs with an aide guiding him, headed up the hill past Tobin, but then slipped. As Fortner's aide moved to help, Tobin didn't blink. He "got down and lifted his opponent up with his guide, and then helped push him up the hill.'' Fortner went on to win the race, crossing the finish line 2 seconds before Tobin, who could be seen clapping and cheering. Tobin's coach, Jason Hyatt said, "It was touching to see, and ... a great example of true sportsmanship." Fortner's coach was also impressed and sent an email to the school praising Tobin's selflessness writing: "It was an awesome display of sportsmanship and kindness. Jake deserves to be commended!!!!" (Syracuse.com)

Yes, You Are Getting Way More Robocalls!

When your phone rings today, odds are high it will be a robocall - and you will probably get more than one of them in the next 24 hours. In fact, you may feel like you've gotten more of them than ever this year. Well you wouldn't be wrong. The number of robocalls placed nationwide increased 50 percent from February to July, according to data from YouMail, a company that provides voicemail and call-blocking services to iPhone and Android users. Robo-dialed and unwanted telemarketing calls were the top consumer complaint to the Federal Communications Commission last year, and they are again this year. This puts those complaints ahead of billing disputes, service availability and program indecency. The FCC encourages consumers to let unknown calls go to voicemail, or to hang up on calls that ask them to press a button to stop receiving future calls. The FCC also recommends joining the National Do Not Call Registry, which prevents callers from being bothered by lawful telemarketers. But don't expect that to fix everything. While the Do Not Call list will stop calls from legitimate businesses, experts said illegal callers have no problem ignoring the list. Mobile carriers and phone manufacturers have stepped up their efforts to fight robocalls as well. The nation's four largest carriers, AT&T, Verizon, T-Mobile, and Sprint, all offer robocall-blocking services. (NBC News)

The Most Famous Paper Jam in History?

Remember that $1.4 million painting from artist Bansky that partially shredded right after it sold at auction? Well the shredding stunt at a London auction house might be the most lucrative paper jam in history. A new video from the artist suggests that a hidden shredder was supposed to destroy the entire painting, not leave it partially intact. A caption in the video reads: "In rehearsals it worked every time." But because the shredder apparently malfunctioned, the red balloon in "Girl With Balloon" remains visible, and the anonymous person who bought the spray-painted work for $1.4 million decided to keep it. The AP notes the fact the shredding stopped right above the girl's head "drew speculation that the act was a stunt to increase the value of the painting." Things may have gone awry, but the piece, renamed "Love is in the Bin," is indeed believed to be more valuable now. (CNN)

Paralyzing Sex?

Over in the UK, 46-year-old Claire Busby is suing the Berkshire Bed Company, claiming that a faulty bed caused her to be catapulted from the bed while she was having sex - an accident that left her paralyzed. Busby says the bed had been delivered a week prior and while she and her partner were "getting' busy" the bed somehow collapsed and she was thrown from it, falling off the end and landing on her head. She says, "I spun around, I put my hand down and then I felt like I was catapulted off the back of the bed. I fell to the side and heard what felt like a spring in my body snap." Her then-partner testified that he saw her roll backward off the bed and initially laughed when she told him she couldn't feel her limbs, thinking she was joking. In fact she received a severe spinal injury from the fall. She's looking for seven figures over the 2013 incident, but lawyers for the company say the bed was properly assembled and not faulty. A lawyer for the firm says, "It is overwhelmingly likely that, whatever her actions, they were too close to the edge of the bed and she simply lost balance and toppled backwards." (Guardian)

It Must Suck to Get Beaten By a Dead Pimp

Despite being found dead on Tuesday, Nevada's most famous pimp will most likely still win a Nov. 6 election to the state legislature. The body of Dennis Hof, who marketed himself as a Donald Trump-style Republican in his race for a heavily GOP Assembly district, was found at his Love Ranch brothel outside Las Vegas following a weekend of parties celebrating his 72nd birthday. No foul play is suspected, but it could be six weeks before a cause of death is determined. Voting begins tomorrow (Saturday), but it's too late to change the ballots, which have been printed and mailed. Even though officials will post notices at the polls that Hof died, he seems likely to get elected, meaning another Republican will be nominated to fill the vacancy. Friend Heidi Fleiss told reporters, "It's too bad that he didn't get to see this through. He saw it as going all the way to governor one day." (Newser)

Eat Fresh!

Police in Norcross, Georgia are searching for a robbery suspect from one of the strangest stories in robbery history. Allegedly, 34-year-old Zachary Miller ordered a sandwich at a Subway restaurant. Then, while waiting for the sandwich, he suddenly jumped over the counter, demanded cash and opened the cash register. He got a whopping $100 before fleeing but then realized he had left the sandwich behind. So he actually went back to get it! He then fled the scene again- in a black, 2003 Acura 3TS with the Tennessee license tag R9230J. Be careful with this guy. Miller has multiple warrants in Tennessee and Georgia. (WGCL News)

What the What?

His name may be Gardner, but he's definitely not one. In Salem, Massachusetts, a man police dubbed the "Brazen Botanist" was captured on a surveillance camera actually stealing hanging plants from a porch. It's more serious than you think. After pleading guilty, 43-year-old Joseph Gardner was sentenced to one year in jail. Tips to police lead them to Gardner's girlfriend's home where they found two of the three missing plants. (Newser)

DID YOU KNOW?

According to Psychology magazine, studies show that not only does an unhappy marriage make you miserable, it also makes wounds heal more slowly.

The average working woman hits the snooze button roughly 20 times a week.

92% of frequent flyer miles go un-used every year.

A study found that people hate looking at other people's selfies unless it came from them.

68% of women feel guilty if they leaving dishes in the sink in the morning when going to work.

A survey asked Americans to name the most stressful thing in their lives. Number one was the mortgage payment. Number two was having family come visit from out of town for the holidays.

Half of all women have bought outfits that are too small even though they can't wear them (in hopes that one day they will fit into them).

THINGS YOU NEED TO KNOW

Mariska Hargitay has listed her 6-story New York City town home on the market for $10.75 million.

Just a reminder that the odds of you winning the Mega Millions lottery tonight are one in 302.5 million.

Fans of "The Golden Girls" can now munch on a box of cereal inspired by the four famous women. The limited-edition multigrain Os, created by pop culture brand Funko, are bright blue. Plus, each package comes with a tiny collectible figurine.

Rihanna reportedly turned down an opportunity to perform at halftime of Super Bowl 53 because she "supports Colin Kaepernick," according to US Weekly's Nicholas Hautman.

Burger King is introducing it's "Nightmare King" on Monday -- saying it's "clinically proven to cause nightmares." It features a quarter pound of flame-grilled beef, a white meat crispy chicken fillet, melted American cheese, thick-cut bacon, creamy mayonnaise and onions on a glazed green sesame seed bun. Yes, a green bun.

In her first appearance since their breakup, Ariana Grande showed up with her Pete Davidson tattoo covered up.

A roasted pig head was seized from a traveler's luggage at Atlanta's airport.

Iconic character Lex Luthor will be introduced in the current season of "Supergirl." The character was last seen on the former WB Network turned CW's "Smallville" played by Michael Rosenbaum.

34% of U.S. pay-TV subscribers changed their service in the past year.

The L.A. Angels are opting out of their lease with Anaheim Stadium.

President Trump and first lady Melania Trump have submitted their 2017 federal income tax returns after filing a six-month extension in April.

Third Eye Blind's ex-guitarist Kevin Cadogan is suing the band and its frontman, Stephan Jenkins, saying they owe him money from album sales.

If you're planning to head to the new "Halloween" movie, you should know that all AMC theaters have banned wearing masks.

Even though Nevada brothel owner Dennis Hof died this week, he's still expected to win an election to the Nevada state Legislature in less than three weeks.

A majority of Americans believes the U.S. is in a trade war with other countries, according to the most recent @Marketplace-Edison Research Poll.

Caroll Spinney is retiring after nearly five decades playing both Big Bird and Oscar the Grouch on Sesame Street.

Florida Atlantic University football coach Lane Kiffin has offered a scholarship to an 11-year-old sixth grader.

If you're a fan of "Orange is the New Black," it'll officially end after the 7th season.

Target is offering an Advent Calendar this year with cheese in the boxes you open each day.

TODAY IS

Baseball slugger Jose Bautista turns 38 today. He's a Blue Jay and migrates south during the off-season.

SNL alum Chris Kattan turns 48 today. We'll always have the Night at the Roxbury.

Trey Parker, half of the duo that gave us "South Park" and "The Book of Mormon," turns 49 today. I would think those two accomplishments alone would be enough... but noooo! I'm pretty sure he's offended everyone possible and are having to go back to the beginning of the list and start over.

President Carter's daughter, Amy, turns 51 today. That piece of AARP junk mail is waiting for her in the mailbox.

Mr. Extreme Makeover: Home Edition, Ty Pennington, turns 54 today. He's about due for one himself!
He plans an extreme birthday party, home edition.
Almost time to tear him down and start over.
He doesn't blow out the candles on his cake, he just "moves that bus!"

Evander Holyfield turns 56 today. Well, what Mike Tyson didn't bite off turns 55 today.

Singer Jeannie C. Riley is still feuding with the Harper Valley P.T.A., even at age 73.

John Lithgow from "Third Rock from the Sun" turns 73 today in earth years. Lithgow and Jeannie C. Reilly both turn 73 today. You know, you never see them together at the same time.

ON THIS DAY

On this date in 1216, King John of England died after eating too many peaches washed down with beer. Just proves what I've always said: peaches are bad for you.

In 1781, British troops surrendered at Yorktown ending the Revolutionary War. Suddenly, red coats were out.

The Star Spangled Banner was sung publicly for the first time at the Halliday Theater in Baltimore way back in 1814. Immediately afterwards, someone yelled out, "Play ball!" which was strange, since baseball hadn't been invented yet. 

On this date in 1859, Wilhelm Tempel discovered diffuse nebula around Pleid star Merope. Reaction was the same all around the world: "Huh?"

In 1872, the world's largest gold nugget was found in New South Wales. It was the loudest anyone ever said the word, "Mine!"

On this date in 1874, the very first wedding ever to take place in a hot balloon occurred over Cincinnati, Ohio. Sadly, three people perished going for the bouquet.
Things were going great until the groom decided to carry the bride over the threshold. So sad.
Things went really well until they went to leave down the aisle.
The bride said she felt like she was on a cloud, but she had to come down some time.
Unfortunately, the groom was in such a rush to get to the honeymoon, he fell to his death.
No chance of a runaway bride at that one. Yes, their honeymoon plans were up in the air.

In 1879, Thomas Edison perfected his invention of the light bulb. Unfortunately, it was during the daytime, so not as impressive as it would have been at night. Some of the earlier versions wouldn't work and then all of a sudden, a light bulb came on!

Time to play "Who Invented It?" Ready? Lets play.
Gas Burner (1855) Weisbach, Bunsen *** or Edison
Tupperware (1945) Tupper ***, Hewitt or Hoffman
Microphone (1877) Taylor, Edison or Berliner ***
Polaroid Camera (1948) Eastman, Land *** or Braun
Dynamite (1866) Carrier, Browning or Nobel ***
Revolver Pistol ((1836) Colt ***, Maxim or Browning
Stock Ticker (1870) Edison ***, Marconi or Bell
Frozen Food (1924) Birdseye ***, Edison or Sperry
Gasoline Automobile (1889) Daimler ***, Duryea or Bosch
Neon Lamp (1909) Edison, Claude *** or Braun


On this date in 1953, Julius LaRosa, a regular on the CBS television program "Arthur Godfrey Time," was fired on the air by Godfrey... years before Donald Trump fired people for entertainment.

In 1998, the U.S. Government opened its antitrust case against Microsoft, which is about the time my computer started acting up.