(Reader's Digest) Thom S. Rainer, the founder of Church Answers, an online community for church leaders, asked ministers and churchgoers alike to share the best excuses they've heard for skipping church:

  • "I couldn't get the lid off the peanut butter."
  • "The church is too close to drive and too far to walk."
  • "Both of my girlfriends attend church there."
  • "The pastor stays in the Bible too much."
  • "The pastor is too attractive. When I see him preaching, I have impure thoughts and I am distracted."
  • "My wife cooked bacon for breakfast, and our entire family smelled like bacon."
  • "The worship leader pulls up his pants too often. It's distracting."
  • "I always get hemorrhoids on Sundays."
  • "Someone called me 'brother' instead of using my name."


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