WOULD YOU RATHER

• Would you rather stand for 8 hours a day in the same spot in front of Wal-Mart while a greeter welcomes you again and again or spend every evening watching the same Cialis commercial over and over? 
• Would you rather be able to nullify your personal gravity whenever you like or turn bananas into gold? 
• Would you rather have 2-foot-long arm pits or eyeballs that bounced in your eye sockets whenever you hear music. 
• Would you rather streak naked through the office, or be known as the office farter? 
• Would you rather have perfect health but have a sex change operation, or keep your sex but be confined to a wheel chair after losing both arms and both legs? 
• Would you rather be a justice on the Supreme Court or be a highly popular Oscar winning actor? 
• Would you rather know the lyrics to every song made in the fifties or every song made in the seventies? 
• Would you rather have your spouse be disappointed in you, or have a child be disappointed in you? 
• Would you rather have the ability to silence with a stare or have arms of ever changing length? 
• What would you rather hear: "I'm sorry, I thought that was a urinal" or "I'm glad you like it, my secret ingredient is boogers."