TOP FIVE SIGNS YOU'RE EATING TOO MUCH SALAD

1. You hear a voice in your stomach yelling, "Hey! Got any meat up there?"
2. You hear the phrase, "Let us pray" and you think they said, "Lettuce pray"
3. The new license plate SALADETR was a bit much
4. At night, you like cuddling with croutons
5. In the morning, you've started dressing on the side