ON THIS DAY
- How they got all those sailors on a roll of paper towels is beyond me.
- They should have known there would be trouble on board a ship named for a paper towel.
- The famous "Mutiny of the Bounty" took place when the crew of the ship ignored the captain and switched from Bounty to the cheaper Costco brand of paper towels.
In 1914, W.H. Carrier patented the air conditioner.
- Most had the same reaction: "Cool!"
- You would have thought that happened more during the summer.
- That's the device that inspired wives everywhere to say, "Does it have to be that cool in here?"
- After getting it to finally work, he chilled.
On this date in 1919, the very first successful parachute jump was made.
- Notice I didn't say the first parachute jump.
- Obviously by someone who had absolutely nothing with the previous attempts.
- It went so smoothly: jump out, count to ten and pull the ripcord!
- By then they had figured out it was not a good idea to count to 200 before pulling the ripcord.
In 1945, Italian dictator Benito Mussolini and his mistress were captured and executed. When it became clear they needed a new leader, it saved a lot of money on pensions.
Adolf Hitler married Eva Braun on this date in 1945. Two days later, they committed suicide. Pretty lousy way of getting out of writing thank you notes for the wedding presents.
On this date in 1958, Vice President Richard Nixon began a goodwill tour of South America. He came back and said the Goodwill stores down there were in pretty bad shape.
In 1993, the very first "Take Your Daughter to Work Day" was held. The following day, the very first, "Oh, honey, I'm sorry I forgot and went home without you last night" Day took place...
Jessica Alba turns 36. Is that the one that's married to Justin Timberlake or the one that was in Flashdance?
Actor Jorge Garcia turns 44 today.
Forever remembered as Hurley on "Lost," unless you've already forgotten.
He's a big dude. Jorge appeared on "Lost" as the island, Hurley.
Whatever you do, don't buy him lottery tickets. (That's what brought him misfortune in the show.)
Penelope Cruz turns 43 today. She once dated Tom Cruise, but when it almost got serious, they couldn't agree on the proper spelling of Cruise. Too bad she and Tom Cruise couldn't have hit it off. She could have become Penelope Cruz-Cruise.
Rap singer Too Short turns 51. It seems like it's time for him to give up that name. He's been Too Short Too Long.
Jay Leno turns 67 today. He may have a show tonight somewhere, but it won't be a Tonight Show. He's almost old enough to... oh, wait -- he already did!
Kiss Your Mate Day -- A day set aside to kiss your mate when they're least expecting it. So, when would that be?
Great Poetry Reading Day -- Even if you don't write, you can listen. Many bookstores offer one evening a month where aspiring poets can take center stage.
MY OTHER THOUGHTS FOR TODAY
The Writers Guild of America has voted to authorize a strike. And the plot thickens...
A company in Japan has created a device to help parents shut down their child's smartphone if they use it too much. Didn't that use to be called, 'parenting?'
Spirit Airlines has scored the lowest customer satisfaction rating in its industry for the third year in a row. A company spokesman said, "Who cares?"
The new United Airlines slogan is NOT "Fly the Bunny-Killin' Skies if We Don't Drag You Off First." Just a bad rumor...