In 1785, Benjamin Franklin invented the first bifocals.
- For those whose glasses that like to go both ways.
- Which allowed you to lose one pair of glasses, rather than taking all the time to lose two.
- After he accidently sat on his two pairs of glasses. Might as well make lemonade out of lemons!
- Naturally, he became the first person to misplace his bifocals. (And of course, how can you look for them if you can't see clearly?)
- After he missed reading that warning on the kite not to fly it in an lightning storm.
On this date in 1892, a British dentist invented the tube of toothpaste.
- Yeah, we're squeezing everything possible out of today's history calendar.
- Isn't that amazing? Who knew Britain had dentists?
- Isn't it amazing how people who squeeze the tube in the middle always marry people who squeeze their tube from the end?
- So that couples would have something to fight about. "Squeeze from the middle"... "No, roll it up from the end!"
In 1961, the world's first revolving restaurant opened at the top of the Space Needle in Seattle. Over time, the wooden horses were replaced with regular restaurant tables & chairs.
Ginnifer Goodwin (Snow White on "Once Upon a Time") turns 39 today. Mirror, Mirror, on the wall, who's eating birthday cake most of all?
Actress Alison Eastwood -- yes, Clint's daughter -- turns 45 today.
It's supermodel Naomi Campbell's 47th birthday. She plans a quiet evening at home, lighting the candles on her cake and then throwing her phone at them.
Elton John's former writing partner, Bernie Taupin, turns 67 today. "The Bitch is Back," "Candle in the Wind" and a ton of others. Yes, together, they were responsible for more hits than "The Sopranos."
Baseball pitcher Tommy John turns 74 today. His career is long over but his surgery lives on.
Billionaire Oil Man T. Boone Pickens turns 89. Good. I still have time to prove, somehow, that I'm related.
U.S. National Maritime Day -- The International Maritime Organization has issued fairly extensive rules about the location and size of lifeboats a cruise ship must offer, and how quickly a company should be able to clear its ship. If an evacuation alarm sounds, cruise-ship passengers are supposed to proceed to the loading area and board a lifeboat that was assigned to them based on their cabin numbers. Some evacuations are far more chaotic than that, and the crew just loads whoever is ready to go. In those emergency situations, men sometimes step aside for the women to go first, but it's not a matter of maritime law, nor is the tradition observed in many parts of the world. Similarly, the captain has no obligation to go down with the ship, and he or she doesn't have to be the last person to step into a lifeboat.