ON THIS DAY
ON THIS DAY
It was on this date in 1709 that Robin Crusoe was rescued. Sadly, he had to leave his volleyball Wilson behind. Wait, am I confused?
On this date in 1790, the U.S. Supreme Court teamed up for the first time, although most of them spent the whole time on the bench.
In 1893, Thomas Edison finished the first-ever movie production studio. The next invention on his list? The $10 tub of popcorn.
On this date in 1898, the very first auto insurance policy was sold by Travelers. Ironically, on the same day, the first-ever travel insurance policy was sold by a guy named Otto.
It was on this date in 1914 that Pennsylvania created the very first movie censorship board.
- There were quite a few people who felt it was about (blank) time.
- As to what people thought of the board? Sorry, it was censored.
- How did most people feel about the idea? They weren't allowed to say.
On this date in 1920, the world's first armored car hit the streets. Up until that time, armored car robbers were bored out of their minds. It not only protected valuables while in transit, it also allowed the driver to flip off as many people as he wanted to...
In 1951, an atomic explosion was shown on TV for the very first time.
- Critics called it "too predictable," which resulted in quite a bit of fallout.
- It was the biggest bomb ever seen on television, until the "____ Show."
- Critics called it "a bomb."
Skippy Peanut Butter was first sold in 1933 -- Doctors at Tufts University have come up with a low-cost way to keep yourself free of coughs and sniffles this winter. A study shows you can slash your risk of colds and flu by 30 percent by eating peanut butter for breakfast. Peanut butter is loaded with Vitamin E, which has a proven track record in fending off viruses like the ones responsible for colds and flu.
Pauley Shore turns 48 today. I wonder how many times people have said over the years, "Why couldn't you take Pauley Shore instead?"
Elvis's little girl, Lisa Marie Presley, also turns 48 today. She's been married four times, including to Michael Jackson and Nicholas Cage.
- Why would you marry Lisa Marie? Well its, one, for the money... two, for the show...
- Hey, if you're old enough to know her, you're old enough to know what a 45 is.
- However, we're fast approaching the stage where I say "Elvis' daughter" and more people are thinking, "Elvis Costello has a daughter that old?"
Sherilyn Fenn turns 51 today. She played the naughty Audrey a way back in "Twin Peaks." Today, she's making as many movies as Pauley Shore and Lisa Marie Presley combined.
It's Groundhog's Day Eve! Do you check your shadow on Groundhog's Day Eve or Morning? Somewhere, a ground hog is doing his stretches, getting ready for his big day tomorrow.
TOP FIVE SIGNS YOU MAY BE OUT OF SHAPE
- Richard Simmons tells you, "You're on your own."
- Got a hernia from deep-breathing exercises
- You've got a contract with Nike not to wear their brand
- You pulled a muscle thinking about how out of shape you are
- You need two belts
Scientists have brought back a cousin of the zebra that has been extinct for 100 years. Didn't anyone take notes during any of the Jurassic Park movies?
An Idaho man who legally changed his name to Santa Claus was arrested for DUI. He's being held in something that was also renamed, "the Toyshop."
Donald Trump called Brussels, Belgium a "hell hole." Someone got an "Insult a Day" calendar for Christmas!
By the way, a guy who threw a tomato at Donald Trump during a rally has been charged with disorderly conduct... and second degree "terrible aim."
Mattel says they're going to start making Barbie dolls in various body shapes, to make them more realistic. Ken's reaction? "Great. Just great."
An analyst for Time magazine had advice for Republicans. He said the key to keep the party going is to bring in young women. To which Bill Clinton replied, "Well, duh!"
Time to flip over the calendar. Oh, wow. It was still on December anyway..
For Desert Radio AZ, I'm Crusty Windbreaker
Comments
Post a Comment