TODAY IS

Macaulay Culkin, the little kid from "Home Alone," turns 36 today.
  • My guess is he'll spend his birthday any way other than Home Alone.
  • Sadly, in spite of all his childhood success, he's right back where he started from: Home Alone.
  • He could discovered a cure for every disease ever known and still be known as "that kid from Home Alone."
  • Unfortunately, everyone in his family went to the party and forgot to take him along.
  • Think they'll ever try to do a reunion movie? Like he now has a family of his own and forgets his kids at home?
  • For his b-day, he invited Joe Pesci to come over to his house for a party, but understandably, Joe's afraid to go in.

Melissa McCarthy turns 46 today. Good golly, ex-Molly. I'm not making fun of her 'cause she could hurt me. Hey, where'd her birthday cake go? It was right next to her, just a minute ago!

National Dog Day -- It's aim is to honor dogs, and to rescue dogs from homelessness and abuse. It was founded in 2004 by National Dog Day Foundation. National Dog Day wishes to encourage dog ownership of all breeds and embraces the opportunity for all dogs to live a happy, safe and "abuse-free life."

Women's Equality Day -- We say forget all that stuff about gender equality. Men and women are different, and new studies show that women have the upper hand. Science proves what you always suspected, women are superior. They have stronger hearts and more robust immune systems. They also have better memories, more sensitive noses, more refined taste buds and they live longer.
  • Brain: Certain parts of the female brain linked to language have more nerve cells than a man's, giving women an advantage in reading and speech.

  • Ears: A woman's hearing is more sensitive and she uses both ears when listening to a conversation, while guys tend to use only one. Also, men start losing their hearing earlier at age 32 compared to 38 in women.

  • Eyes: Color blindness is less of a problem for women because the most common form of the disorder is hereditary and carried only in men.

  • Nose: With flatter, smaller noses, women can discern the mere wisp of a smell.

  • Mouth: Foods pack more of a wallop for women because female saliva enlivens the taste of sweet or spicy foods.

  • Heart: Women's hearts beat faster than men's, 90 times per minute compared to 80 while awake, and 66 to 56 during sleep.

  • Armpits: Perfume isn't the only reason women smell better. They perspire less because they have fewer sweat glands.

  • Hands: Men are more likely to be left-handed, and that makes their lives more difficult since most tools and appliances are built for right-handers.

  • Liver: Women process medication differently, often enhancing the effect. But they're slower to break down alcohol and so they get tipsy quicker.

  • Joints: The hormone estrogen heightens the elasticity of women's tissue and joints.

  • Lungs: Women don't get the hiccups as often as men, and they breathe slower at nine breaths a minute to a man's 12.

  • Hormones: Estrogen boosts the good cholesterol and lowers the bad kind. It also prevents fatty build-up in the arteries and shields a woman's bones, heart and brain.

  • Stomach: The female digestive tract works slower, giving the body more time to absorb the nutrients from food.

  • Immune system: The hardier immune system of the female battles viruses, bacteria and parasites more successfully.


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