TOP EASTER BUNNY PET PEEVES

• Allergies to plastic grass have made it become increasingly difficult to perform job. 
• No matter how much fiber he eats, can only muster those tiny round movements. 
• Sick and tired of harassing phone calls from Elmer Fudd. 
• Every year, Santa laughs and slams door in his face when he asks if the elves could give him a hand. 
• Candy makers who create his likeness in chocolate too often exaggerate the size of his ears, yet underestimate the size of other body parts. 
• Tired of receiving junk mail addressed to Peter Cottontail. 
• The one major perk of his job, Easter Candy, has also caused him to have rotted teeth. 
• Sick of being teased about carrying a marshmallow peep. 
• Litigation against Cadbury Bunny still unresolved. 
• Continually frustrated by being shot at every time he visits _____'s. (redneck part of town)