ON THIS DAY

On this date in 1793, Eliphalet Remington was born. His name still appears on the guns he helped to develop. With a first name like Eliphalet, you can see why he took up guns.

Isaac Singer was born in 1811. He, of course, invented the sewing machine and became quite successful... even though he started without a stitch.

Macy's opened its first store in New York City on 6th Avenue on this date in 1858.

• The very first customer walked in the door and immediately asked, "So, when's the big parade?" 
• Needless to say, that year's Thanksgiving Day parade was really small. 
• Fortunately, just in time for the Macy's Thanksgiving Day parade several weeks later. 
• Don't know where Santa hung out every Christmas before that. 
• It was going to be a "One Day Only" sale... and the rest is history. 
• That was so long ago, back when their "one day only" sales were actually one day. 

On this date in 1880, Theodore Roosevelt marries Alice Lee, on his 22nd birthday. Four years later, she died after giving birth to their only child, Alice Lee Roosevelt.

Boxer Shorts were introduced way back in 1901 -- Psychiatrist Dr. Douglas LaDier says men that wear boxer shorts to bed are good at details and like order in their lives. They're warm, friendly and caring. They remember birthdays, anniversaries and other important dates. Yeah, right. What do the ladies perfer a man wear under his pants?

• Boxers, 43% 
• Boxer briefs, 38% 
• Briefs, 14% 
• Nothing, 5% 

Boxers or Briefs: Cosmopolitan tells us what a man's underwear says about him:

• Briefs -- He likes to be babied a bit, is neat, and a down-to-earth guy who's got a direction in life. 
• Boxers -- He has a sense of humor and likes to cuddle. 
• The Boxer Brief -- He's carefree and athletic. 
• Bikini -- This guy is a hopeless flirt who usually likes to show off his body. 

On this date in 1904, the first subway opened up in New York City. I had no idea they had been making sandwiches that long.

In 1910, the U.S. annexed west Florida from Spain. Spain even threw in some old voting machines, which are still in use today.

On this date in 1938, DuPont announced a new synthetic fiber had been created, something they called "nylon."

• It wasn't long until the phrase, "Crap! Snagged another one!" was born. 
• In no time at all, American women were hosed. 
• Of course, there was a run on it, which they were able to stop with nail polish. 

In 1954, Walt Disney's first TV show, "Disneyland," premieres on ABC. It began with the disclaimer, "You need to be this tall to watch this show."

In 1954, Marilyn Monroe and Joe DiMaggio were divorced. No one thought the marriage would last. Even the minister expressed doubts during the ceremony.

TODAY IS

Lonzo Ball with the Los Angeles Lakers is 20. He's already earned what I'll earn in my lifetime.

Kelly Osbourne is 33 today. She grew up fairly normal, all things considered. There's someone who will make you appreciate your parents even more. She, of course, is famous for... uh, being famous.

Simon Lebon of Duran Duran turns 59 today. Not surprising, he likes wines from Walla Walla and goes to Little Caesar's for Pizza Pizza. Some say he's the "Duran" in Duran Duran. They just don't say which one.

Golf Hall-of-Famer Patty Sheehan turns 61 today. She's the golfer that once protested out in front of former President Bush's house, right? Wait... I think I'm confused.

Lee Greenwood, who gave us "God Bless the USA," turns 75 today. If you've never heard the song, it's basically an attempt to Make America Proud Again. No doubt, a red, white and blue birthday cake again.

And now for something completely different -- John Cleese of Monty Python fame turns 78 today.