TODAY IS

One week from today, people.

Christina Aguilera celebrates birthday number 38 today. Not sure if she could still fit into those Mouseketeer ears. She needs that Genie in the Bottle a little bit more each year.

Katie Holmes turns the big 4-0 today. She showed us that all it takes to be successful in Hollywood is work hard, believe in your abilities and have Tom Cruise's baby. This year, she's looking forward to another Christmas where she doesn't have to wear a foil hat and is 100% Tom Cruise free. She's Tom Cruise's ex and Jamie Foxx's not-so-secret current.

Rap singer DMX turns 48 today. Maybe some year, someone will buy him a vowel for his name.

Wrestler "Stone Cold" Steve Austin hits 54 today. He's going to spend a quiet night at home, body slamming a cake.

Brad Pitt turns double-nickels today-- 55. I know it wouldn't matter, but we thought we'd tell you anyway.

Ray Liotta turns 64 today. Born in Newark, New Jersey, not surprising. To me, he's got scary eyes. Put him in a Santa outfit and I'd switch to Kwanza.

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