TODAY IS

Brie Larson, the new "Captain Marvel" turns 29 in earth years.

Zach Galifianakis, whose name could single handedly wipe out a Scrabble game, turns 49 today. He had to get famous, if nothing else, to help people pronounce his name right.

Cindy Margolis turns 53 today. Never heard of her. Oh, THOSE pictures.

Baseball hitting coach Mark McGwire turns 55 today. Obviously, he'll test positive for birthday cake today. He knocked out 70 home runs in 1998. He nailed Madonna in 2010.

Randy Quaid turns 68 today. He'll always be Cousin Eddy to me. What's your favorite cousin Eddy quote? "That's what they call an R... V..."

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