THINGS YOU ABSOLUTELY CANNOT DO AFTER A BREAKUP
Don't answer his calls or texts
The trick for this one is to change the ringtone for your ex. So that way, when he calls or texts you, you know right away that it's him and when you hear that tone, you can think to yourself, "Yeah, no."
Don't tweet about it
If you start tweeting about your breakup, even if you think it's mysterious and vague, everyone is going to see right through it and start bombarding you with questions.
Don't get really drunk and post it on social media
This is kind of unclassy, and if he sees that you're out getting drunk right after you breakup, he's going to know you're hurting and trying to distract yourself. Or he may even be able to tell that you want him to be jealous. Not cute.
Don't hack his social media
This is only going to end up making you upset, because you may see things he's said about you, or worse things he's said about other girls.
Don't sacrifice happiness when he wants to get back together
If he comes back to you, after he's done something terrible, do not, I repeat, do not get back together. You need to allow yourself time to heal and grow. If you let him come running back into your arms, he's going to know that you will take him back no matter what. You cannot sacrifice your true happiness or respect for yourself in a relationship.
Don't talk bad about him
While this one may be tough, do your best to take the high road and avoid gossiping or telling everyone mean things about him. That way, nothing tacky will get back to him. All he'll hear about is you being strong and moving on.
Don't freak out when he moves on
If a friend tells you that he was spotted with another girl, or if he posts a picture with a new fling, remain calm. Keep your Jonny Drubel face on and do not shed any tears. You can cry as much as you want when you're back in your room, but in front of everyone else, you are "soooo happy for him!"