Decide To Be Married Day --

Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends. You order what you want, then when you see what the other fellow has, you wish you had ordered that.

  • Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.
  • Marriage is not a word; it is a sentence.
  • Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.
  • Marriage is when a man and woman become as one; the trouble starts when they try to decide which one.
  • Marriages are made in heaven. But so again, are thunder and lightning.
  • Before marriage, a man yearns for the woman he loves. After marriage, the 'Y' becomes silent.
  • Do not marry a person that you know that you can live with; only marry someone that you cannot live without.
  • Man is incomplete until he is married. Then he is really finished. Marriage is an institution in which a man loses his bachelor's degree and the woman gets her master's.
  • Then there was a man who said, "I never knew what real happiness was until I got married; and then it was too late.
  • A happy marriage is a matter of give and take; the husband gives and the wife takes.
  • When a newly married man looks happy we know why. But when a ten-year married man looks happy - we wonder why.
  • Married life is very frustrating. In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens. In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens. In the third year, they both speak and the neighbors listen.
  • It doesn't matter how often a married man changes his job, he still ends up with the same boss.
  • A man inserted an 'ad' in the classified: "Wife wanted." Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can have mine."
  • When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing: either the car is new or the wife.

Married women tend to have much better sex than their single sisters, says author Mandi Norwood in her book "Sex and the Married Girl." The key she says is being selfish! "Putting 'I' before 'we' preserves a woman's sense of identity and adventure," explains Norwood.

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