SIGNS SIGNS EVERYWHERE A SIGN
(Cosmopolitan) Here's what each sign is probably doing at a party:
Capricorn - Playing mom
"Where is the recycling bin?" Catch Cap at the end of the night yelling this or calling their tipsy friend a Lyft they immediately Venmo-requesting them for that Lyft.
Libra - Hi-ing everyone
Libras are total pros at making speedy polite exits from conversations so they can focus on giving out the max amount of "OMG, You Came" hugs.
Taurus - Pouring the drinks
They're making rose sangria, refiling the puffy-Cheetos bowl, getting a pample-mousse La Croix out of the fridge for their sober friend basically, taking care of everyone's everything.
Virgo - Getting after it
Virgo is here to let off steam, mmkay? Enjoy as all the rants they've saved up this week come rushing out with a glass of wine or 12.
Leo - Doing karaoke
When a Liza song comes on, Leo will not rest until everyone is singing. Don't worry, they brought their own mic and stage worthy sequins.
Cancer - With the dog
In the event that you actually coaxed a Cancer to a party, make sure to check the host's bedroom every now and then. They're in there petting the resident furbaby.
Aquarius - Too extra for a plus-one
You'll be 20 minutes deep into a debate with one about anything from the Muller report to whether Pete Davidson is hot, before you realize you haven't actually introduced yourself.
Pisces - Laugh-crying
They're all jokes, kisses, and compliments. Until the weed candy gets passed around. Then they're staring deeply into your eyes, predicting your future, and immediately passing out.
Sagittarius - Insisting on a game of flip cup
You'll hear'em before you see them, usually telling a story entirely in hyperbole. Have they invited you to play beer pong, Cards Against Humanity, literally anything yet?
Aries - On the dance floor
And not interest in a chill sesh at all. They'll always take over the Spotify queue and blast Ariana Grande until your neighbors complain.
Gemini - Swapping Insta handles with strangers
Geminis love meeting new people then flirting with said new people. Find them flitting from convo to convo, quoting the latest Chrissy Teigen clapbacks.
Scorpio - Not talking to you
Look to the room's dimly lit corners. Scorpios are standing with the same three people they came with, drunk from a pre-game and totally uninterested in meeting your coworkers.
Capricorn - Playing mom
"Where is the recycling bin?" Catch Cap at the end of the night yelling this or calling their tipsy friend a Lyft they immediately Venmo-requesting them for that Lyft.
Libra - Hi-ing everyone
Libras are total pros at making speedy polite exits from conversations so they can focus on giving out the max amount of "OMG, You Came" hugs.
Taurus - Pouring the drinks
They're making rose sangria, refiling the puffy-Cheetos bowl, getting a pample-mousse La Croix out of the fridge for their sober friend basically, taking care of everyone's everything.
Virgo - Getting after it
Virgo is here to let off steam, mmkay? Enjoy as all the rants they've saved up this week come rushing out with a glass of wine or 12.
Leo - Doing karaoke
When a Liza song comes on, Leo will not rest until everyone is singing. Don't worry, they brought their own mic and stage worthy sequins.
Cancer - With the dog
In the event that you actually coaxed a Cancer to a party, make sure to check the host's bedroom every now and then. They're in there petting the resident furbaby.
Aquarius - Too extra for a plus-one
You'll be 20 minutes deep into a debate with one about anything from the Muller report to whether Pete Davidson is hot, before you realize you haven't actually introduced yourself.
Pisces - Laugh-crying
They're all jokes, kisses, and compliments. Until the weed candy gets passed around. Then they're staring deeply into your eyes, predicting your future, and immediately passing out.
Sagittarius - Insisting on a game of flip cup
You'll hear'em before you see them, usually telling a story entirely in hyperbole. Have they invited you to play beer pong, Cards Against Humanity, literally anything yet?
Aries - On the dance floor
And not interest in a chill sesh at all. They'll always take over the Spotify queue and blast Ariana Grande until your neighbors complain.
Gemini - Swapping Insta handles with strangers
Geminis love meeting new people then flirting with said new people. Find them flitting from convo to convo, quoting the latest Chrissy Teigen clapbacks.
Scorpio - Not talking to you
Look to the room's dimly lit corners. Scorpios are standing with the same three people they came with, drunk from a pre-game and totally uninterested in meeting your coworkers.
Comments
Post a Comment