RIDICULOUS, ANNOYING THINGS PEOPLE SAY WHEN YOU GET MARRIED

For some baffling, annoying reason, crossing the threshold from single to married seems to open a Pandora's box of weird, random, and downright ridiculous remarks and questions. Here, 16 of some of the most common, annoying, and/or completely crazy:

  1. "So ... when are you having kids?" (And any variation on this, like, "When are you going to start trying?" or "Are you pulling the goalie?")
  2. "You're not hyphenating and/or taking his horrible last name, right?"
  3. "Are you still allowed to go out without him?"
  4. "Hey, you know statistics show you have less than a 50 percent chance of this working out, right?"
  5. "He'll make a great first husband!"
  6. "How's the old ball and chain?"
  7. "Congrats! Your sex life is over!"
  8. "I always thought you'd end up with (fill-in-the-blank person or type of person other than the new husband)."
  9. "Is that true what they say about marriage killing your sex life?"
  10. "You probably already miss the single life, huh?"
  11. "Does your husband let you wear THAT?"
  12. "Why bother exercising/eating right? Now that the wedding's over, you can get fat!"
  13. "Here's the card of a divorce lawyer I know in case it doesn't work out."
  14. "Welcome to the club! Now we can be miserable together."
  15. "Why are you doing your hair/makeup? You've already got 'im!"
  16. "Are you still going to work?" ... (Uh, what year is this again?!)

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